1) The ladies love Jeremy Piven.
2) Replacing a bike seat is expensive.
3) Replacing the numbers from a lost cell phone is impossible.
4) Guess what? No matter how powerful you are, your e-mail and IM's will NEVER be private.
5) Everything wrong with America can apparently be traced back to Bill Clinton's penis, which shall forever be referred to on this page as "The Clenis."
6) Trader Joe's is the best grocery store ever.
7) The HP 12-C calculator can figure out just about anything.
8) Want to hear something loud? Sit inside an 'L' car when it's hailing outside.